Adyashanti talks about how we all crave intimacy and deep closeness with others, yet at the same time we are frightened by this closeness. That is because we opened ourselves up to others as children and were wounded...therefore we close down in order to protect ourselves from further hurt.
Adya also says "Somehow, we must find the willingness and the courage to open ourselves to true relationship, so that we can become once again open to true intimacy. Whether through a relationship with another human being, with the environment, or even simply with our own self, the invitation is to come into this true intimacy, this profound sense of human connection." (falling into grace, p. 152).
Being intimate with others "requires a depth of insight and a deep willingness to be open to fear- to be willing to see the parts of you that don't want to open." (falling into grace, p. 153). This requires not only being in beginner's mind, but also being in beginner's heart.
The questions that I ask myself are 'Am I willing to be open and vulnerable in relationships so that I can find where I am blocked (i.e., where my inner thorns are that I am protecting)?' 'Am I willing to face the pain when it arises so that I can let go of these blocks and move into a deeper realization of Self and a greater intimacy with others?' This is a daily practice and every moment is an opportunity to become more intimate with myself, my environment or others. It all boils down to whether I am willing to experience the pain in the short run in order to have freedom and the intimacy that I crave in the long run.
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