I have noticed how often I defend myself. Here are a couple of examples that might not seem like defensiveness at first glance. I went skiing yesterday and my negative attitude about certain snow boarders (who my limited self viewed as careless, inconsiderate, dangerous to ski with...) was a defensive reaction. The same was true of my reaction the the guy tail-gating me as I drove down the mountain. In both cases I was defending my image as the careful skiier/driver and was critical of them. My defensiveness was not apparent to the outside world but it was still present.
Michael points out that our self-image is created by thoughts...a set of beliefs that we hold about ourselves, and when the walls of our self-image are threatened, we patch them up with more thoughts (e.g., "I am a more careful driver than him," "skiiers are more considerate than snow boarders"...)
But all of this defending is blocking the light...just like the example of the person who built the comfortable home in the middle of a beautiful, sunlit field and then created artificial light inside the house.
"...we build a world within the confines of our inner walls that is better than the inner darkness. We decorate our walls with the memories of our past experiences and with our dreams of the future...But just as the people in the house had the potential to step out of their own self-made, artificial world into the beauty of the natural light, you can step outside your house of thoughts into the unlimited." (T.U.S., p117).
We do this one thought, one feeling at a time. Watch and release.
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