Are you ready to experience Truth?

What if, even in our best moments as a human being, there was a lot more to each of us than we ever imagined?  What if all that the Sages, Master Teachers and Enlightened Ones have told us is true...that we are One with God, that there is no separation, and that Love is our true essence?

What if the mystical experiences that you have had or have heard about point to who you really are?   What if the limited beliefs and concepts that we cling to are false?  What if there really is nothing to fear because life is Eternal?  

What if we really don't know anything at all?

We won't really know the answers to these questions until we experience Truth.  The question at this point is are we willing to let go of what we know/think/believe to be true and step into the mystery of Life and of God?  Can we trust God to show us our True nature?

"Unless you become like little children you shall not enter the Kingdom of God."

Little children live in the moment without clinging to expectations, beliefs and judgments.  They allow life to show up without trying to orchestrate, predict, resist or alter their experience,

Sitting in the silence, letting go of attachments, living mindfully, and praying without ceasing are all ways to prepare ourselves to experience Truth.  

As we continue to make room for more Light to fill us and as we prepare to step into a New Year, are we ready to let go of our limited beliefs and attachments and let Truth be revealed to us?

The Little Drummer Boy

For many of us, Christmas, Hanukkah etc. represent the birth of more Light into our lives.

An idea to contemplate during this time is:

What is it that I really want for Christmas?

What I really want for Christmas does not come from the world.  What I really want comes from Grace, God, Spirit, Life.  The Joy that I would like to receive (i.e., experience) and give arises when I open my heart and mind to experience the Light in the present moment.  I love the analogy here of opening to the present...sounds like 'opening a gift'.

I am inspired by the Litte Drummer Boy story.  My understanding of the story is that the little drummer boy's parents died and he found his way to the manger.  He felt that he had nothing to give to the newborn King.  Then the little drummer boy decided to play his drum and as the song goes "I played my best for Him... and He smiled at me."

The loss of his parents symbolizes the loss of our egoic attachments.  The little drummer boy then brought the best that he could to the moment in order to honor the Light of Christ.  To continue the analogy, the Light within responded with more Light, a Radiant smile.

How are you being asked to let go of egoic attachments this holiday season? How are you being asked to 'play your best' in order to honor the Light within?

For me this is about letting go of expectations and positionalities.  It is about staying centered in the Truth of my being.   The best that I can do is to keep my awareness on my connection with Spirit even in the midst of the ups and downs of life.  I can participate in the festivities and the stresses of the season without getting caught up in them.  I notice and appreciate what is happening but return to the awareness that God is my source of Joy at all times.  And as I say 'yes' to more Light I feel it fill my being and my awareness.

Wishing you a Blessed week filled with Joy and Light!

"Thoughts stay because we invite them to stay."

At various moments throughout the past week I have noticed when I have been perceiving life through the egoic, limited mind and when I have been peering through the lens of my deepest Truth. Everything changes when I perceive and act from my highest Truth - I feel more peaceful and loving, I judge less, I let things go more easily, and my words and actions have a greater positive impact on my world.

Yesterday morning I found myself stuck in the egoic mind.  I was holding onto some negativity about a situation, judging myself and others, and feeling irritated.  I saw what was happening but was unable to let it go.  I decided to re-affirm my intention to embody love.  I searched deep within myself for the decision to let go of this negativity and I surrendered it to God.  I then did a little yoga to center myself and a few minutes later the negativity lifted and I felt a sense of love and gratitude.  Every time this kind of negativity returns I remind myself of my intention and I surrender it to God.  

Michael Singer says "Thoughts stay because we invite them to stay."  I can see that the egoic mind wants to hold onto negativity.  It will always return to being disgruntled about something...it needs to in order to maintain a sense of separation.  But the reality is that there is no separation because at our core we are all made of the same Divinity.

I will continue to choose to perceive life through the lens of my highest Truth...that God is expressing Itself as Love and Joy in every moment.  I will align with that Truth during this Holiday season, thus allowing more Light to shine in our world.  

Surrender as a way to rasie your consciousness

"The strength to adopt positive instead of negative attitudes is already available in the province of the will.  The entreaty of Divinity for assistance results in a transformative process that becomes more powerful with practice because the personality is now aligning with a strong, positive attractor field rather than with the weak linear ego."  ("Transcending the Levels of Consciousness," David Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D., p. 180)

After setting the intention to embody love (what I wrote about last week), I found myself reading the most transformative words in the above-mentioned book by David Hawkins.  I read about traits and attitudes that I have been holding onto which block me from embodying love.  David says that even just noticing when we are holding onto negative attitudes can help us to let them go.  For the last several days I have felt a shift in that I am feeling more positive and less judgmental/defensive.

The above quote speaks to me so clearly about the power in setting an intention and surrendering or asking God for help.  As David says, as we do so we are aligning ourselves with a higher consciousness.  By setting the intention to live our deepest truth and asking God for help we are raising our consciousness.    

Ask and you shall receive.

What is it that I know at the deepest core of my being?

Happy Thanksgiving.  I am ever so grateful to all of you who read my blog.  It is truly a blessing to have people witness my thoughts and experiences as I write about them in this blog.

I recently completed an on-line class with Adyashanti where he asked the listeners to consider "What it is that they know deeply"...and from a place of lightness to consider "How to embody this knowing in one's life."

I found this to be very powerful.

To the first question the word "Love" jumped into my awareness. Oftentimes I do embody Love but there are many other times when I close off to Love because of fear, judgment, focusing on the future or past instead of the present moment, clinging to expectations about how things should be...

I vow to embody Love on a moment-moment basis and when I fall off the wagon I will forgive myself and get back on track.

As we enter into this Holiday season I invite you to join me in embodying your Highest Truth.

Consider for yourself:  What is it that I know at the deepest core of my being?  And from a place of lightness, how am I being asked by Spirit to embody this knowing?

(Adya said that our deepest knowing does not always appear as something that feels good. Oftentimes Spirit wants us to move out of our comfort zone, so trust what comes to mind for you regardless of how it feels.)

consciously choose alignment with Divinity and Truth

I have been practicing letting go of expectations and not attaching to situations in my life.  I've been saying to myself: "I wonder what today will bring,"  "I wonder how this situation is going to play out," or "Look what my ego is feeling now."

I remind myself that God is my source of Love, Peace, and Joy. I know that looking to the world as my source of good will not work.  The goal is to accept what life has to offer in each moment (both the so-called good and bad) and to allow it to change me, to grow me.  I move my awareness to the neutral observer as often as possible.  I sit in the silence daily to open to Spirit/God/Higher Self.

I find it is becoming easier to rest as the Awareness and to let go of the attachments.  

I sense the vast field of Love, Joy, and Peace that awaits me as I let go more and more.

When the feelings arise and I am having difficulty letting them go, I choose to align with God's will.  Here is an excerpt from "Transcending the Levels of Consciousness" by David Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D discussing this idea:

"Jesus Christ said that fear is the last hindrance to be overcome.  From the viewpoint of consciousness research and its evolution, all fear is a product of the persistence of the ego and its failure to relinquish its sovereignty to the will of God.  Active surrender to God's will is by choice and is a decision of the will... To consciously choose alignment with Divinity and Truth is empowering and shifts identity from the self to the Self, resulting in an increase in confidence, courage, and personal dignity rather than self-abasement or self-denigration."  (pp.116-117)

May we all consciously choose alignment with Divinity and Truth as we enter into this holiday season...letting go of fear, egoic control, and all limiting illusions.

We say "Yes" to the highest and best expression of Life showing up in, as, and through each of us.  

.

"sensing into the neutral witness"

A couple of years ago I was in a situation where I thought I was going to be receiving a fairly substantial sum of money.  I instantly felt a sense of freedom and joy.  Although I did not end up receiving the money, this situation helped me to see first-hand how quickly and easily our energy centers can open. In this case, a situation on the outside occurred that opened me up on the inside.

The Truth is that we are already free, and, joy is our natural state.  In  order to realize this state, we need to let go of the things which keep us closed: limiting thoughts, beliefs, perceptions, feelings...

In my spiritual practice these days I am primarily focused on two things:

First, any time a limiting thought or feeling arises I embody it and surrender it.  If I surrender it with my heart and my true intention than the letting go happens.

And second, as often as I can remember to do so, I put my awareness on the witness.  Adyashanti talks about "sensing into the neutral witness."  This is the place within that is aware of what the human psyche is experiencing.

"Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all else shall be added unto you."  To live from the state of witnessing and not attaching to the beliefs, feelings, perceptions, and outer situations as they arise is a doorway that can lead to God realization.

All of our needs are met because we are One with God.  Notice when the ego wants to deny this reality and convince you that there is not enough or that you are not enough or...

Do not fight the egoic thoughts (that is a losing battle) but do not listen to them either.  Notice and release.  Find a way to sense into the neutral witness and know that all is well now and forevermore.

Honor the Light within

Over the last several months I have added some new practices to my spiritual work including breath-work to release stored energy and a program called Mutual Awakening designed to transcend the illusion of separation.  What appears to be common whether I am doing one of these practices, meditating, or dealing with life mindfully is the idea of accepting what is happening in the moment (including my emotional reactions and thoughts to what is happening) and then opening into the mystery of God.

For example if I am anxious or worried about something I notice the feelings and then surrender them to God.  When I do this I am gently allowing myself to be exactly where I am at, while at the same time letting go of attachment to what I am experiencing which then allows the experience to transform me.

I have had several unusual and beautiful experiences as I have been learning to not resist life.  During a recent session with a client while I was discussing the difference between the egoic self and our True essence, I had an image/experience of my human self moving deep within the core of my being and bowing to the Light within.  I felt a deep sense of love and a desire to worship this Light.

This is the same Light that is at the core of your being.

Let go of the limiting human experiences, beliefs, and feelings that block you, and honor this Light within for it holds the key to your freedom and the awakening of your True Self.

  

embodied confidence - part 2

I had a deeper realization about what I discussed in the post on October 16 (My intention for this year is that the shell be cracked open so spirit can flow freely and that I need to embody confidence in order for this to happen.).  What I can and need to embody with confidence is that I do not need the shell.

I can be confident in that realization.

I can move through my day faithfully knowing that as I let go into each moment Spirit will be guiding me.

I had an experience yesterday that confirmed this realization.  I was at a breath-work session...the idea was to focus on deep, rhythmic breathing and allow the body/mind to release what is not needed. During yesterday's final session I was able to completely immerse my awareness in the breathing (without being in my head) and I had a very powerful experience of releasing.  During the prior sessions I was still caught up in my head and there was not as much of a release.

When we let go we open ourselves to Divine guidance.

Spirit will always be there to catch us and guide us.

Breaking the trance

"Mind has a very powerful ability to put awareness into a trance. Very quickly, we find ourselves lost in that trance.  This trance is precisely what we've been calling 'egoic consciousness'  - the creation of our belief in who we are, which forms the very structure of ego.  Ego is nothing more than the beliefs, ideas, and images we have about ourselves-and so it is actually something completely imaginary." (falling into Grace, p. 53)

How often do we fall into the trance of believing what the mind/ego says about ourselves, others and life?

How often do we go to what Michael Singer termed the 'neurotic roommate' for advice and guidance?

We are so much more than this egoic self.

I choose to no longer live in a trance.

Instead of listening to ego, I will sit in the silence and listen to God.

I will pray for divine guidance.

I will walk beyond my comfort zones in order to dismantle this false identity that I have created.

I will let go of trying to control my life and will deal with whatever is right in front of me.

I will trust life to show me exactly what I need to know.  

I will ask "Who am I?" again and again.

I will forgive myself and others 70 times 7.

I will express gratitude.

 

Embodied Confidence

As I practiced "accepting life" this week, I recognized that resisting my experiences in life (i.e., ignoring or avoiding unwanted thoughts and feelings) keeps me from joyfully moving through life with an open-heart.  Holding on to my experiences in life (i.e., clinging to sadness, fear, happiness etc.) has the same outcome.  When I choose to accept what is happening in my life and allowing the experiences to move through me, I connect with a deeper sense of peace and love.

I re-read my intention for 2014 (written during a visualization exercise last January at CSLCV) and it solidified these ideas about accepting life as it is showing up.

Here are the first 3 questions and my responses:

What is Spirit's highest vision for you? The shell is cracked open and Spirit flows freely.
What do you need to embrace in order for this to happen? Embodied confidence (The word "confidence" actually means "with faith.")
What do you need to let go of in order for this to happen? Fear

It struck me that I can accept whatever is occurring in my life because I have faith/confidence that life unfolds in perfect order and harmony, and, that I am always being guided and supported.  I also embody confidence in my ability to connect with the wisdom of my Higher Self in any situation.

I do not need to worry or resist anything that is showing up because there is something greater than me operating in my life.  And although I may not know exactly how my good will come to me, I am am confident that good is always unfolding in my life.  For example, the source of income may not be clear but I can rest assured that my material needs will be provided for...just as the birds never worry about where their next worm will be coming from.

There will likely be some pain, loss and disappointment along the way but I stand in the faith that as I relax into my life instead of fighting it, I will be taken care of.  When fear arises I feel into it, let go of any thoughts or conclusions that will keep it in place, and open my mind and heart to a Higher Consciousness that is the Truth of my Being.

a doorway to a different possibility

"What happens when you let go of your argument with what is?  No matter how you are feeling...just let it be... (In) the moment when you're willing to no longer be in opposition to anything, you come completely into the now, into this moment.  What you'll begin to experience is a peace and a stillness--a deep inner quietness...a whole different dimension of consciousness, one beyond the ego and its activity."  (Falling into Grace, p. 66)  

We will know that we are completely 'accepting what is' when our awareness is completely in the now.

We can use whatever is happening in any moment to open to a higher consciousness, not by changing anything, just by accepting what is.

"Many people think that this dimension of consciousness of peace, stillness, and well-being is something for which you have to work hard to attain-that somehow it's far away and that you must earn it in some way.  But all these conclusions are just more thoughts in the mind, so as with all thoughts, you can choose to no longer grasp at them.  You can open to a state of being where there are no conclusions, where your mind is wide open, where your consciousness is at ease, and where you can begin to touch upon a whole new dimension of consciousness, a consciousness that actually is at peace.  It's an invitation to just be, to be that consciousness, and also to act from it. Once you taste this stillness, this peace, then the ego will stand out in stark contrast to it.  The vortex of suffering will then be much easier to see.  You may go unconscious for moments, you may not always see the ego trying to hijack you with various thoughts, but even when that happens, if you just stop for a moment and see the pattern, then a gap opens up. It's a doorway to a different possibility-a possibility to experience the peace and happiness for which you've always been longing-even when you are right in the middle of conflict." (Falling into Grace, pp. 66-67)    

This is a spiritual practice that we can do 24-7.  Notice what we are feeling/experiencing each moment and dropping any conclusions including "this shouldn't be," "this is terrible," "this is wonderful,"  etc.  You will know that you have 'accepted what is' if your attention is completely in the now.

I am going to diligently follow this practice and I will post about my experiences.  I invite you to do the same.  It is one thing to read something inspiring and it is another to actually do it.  Writing this blog has helped me to clarify where I am at spiritually and to follow through with the ideas that I have shared.  I would love to hear about how this particular practice is working for you. And you can post anonymously if you prefer.

Baba Muktananda's wisdom

Tomorrow is the 32nd anniversary of Baba Muktananda's transition.

Meditate on your Self, Worship your Self, Kneel to your Self, Honor your Self,  God dwells within you as you. - Baba Muktananda

Pure Consciousness

I would like to share some teachings that I heard on Radio Adyashanti last night,  Adya talked about the importance of "accepting what is" (i.e., stop resisting what is showing up in your life).  The acceptance needs to be  heart-based (as opposed to an intellectual acceptance).  The reason to accept life as it is, is because to do otherwise doesn't work. You can't make life not be the way it is.

The acceptance is not an end-point.  When there is a true acceptance (from the heart) then it becomes a ground-point from which a wise, compassionate, clear response occurs.

Adya also talked about putting your attention on what you love not what you hate, because the transformational energy is in the love.

And finally he described the ego as a filter through which one's consciousness shows up.  The ego isn't a 'thing,' it is a set of beliefs/feelings/perceptions that one holds onto in order to navigate through life.  Some people have a negative ego and therefore their consciousness sees things through a negative lens.  Other people have a positive ego (sometimes it is so positive that they are not accepting what is really happening) and their consciousness sees through this lens.  We can bypass the ego by putting our attention on the part of us that is the awareness or Pure Consciousness.  When we connect with Pure Consciousness we have access to it's guidance.

I had a situation arise where I applied these ideas.  I have been feeling stuck in a certain area of my life and I found myself becoming excited/hopeful about an up-coming event that might change the situation.  I began to notice that the joy that I was experiencing was about a possibility in the future rather than what was happening now. When I put my attention on Pure Consciousness and then shifted my focus to what was happening in the moment my heart opened and I felt my defenses melt away...I moved into a state of receptivity and openness.  This is obviously a much better state to experience than clinging to some future unknown.

Will you say "Yes" to being present with what is and moving your awareness to Pure Consciousness?

a poem about surrender

II, 16

How surely gravity's law,
strong as an ocean current,
takes hold of even the strongest thing
and pulls it toward the heart of the world.

 Each thing -each stone, blossom, child -

is held in place. 

Only we, in our arrogance,

push out beyond what we belong to

for some empty freedom.

If we surrendered
to earth's intelligence
we could rise up rooted, like trees.

Instead we entangle ourselves
in knots of our own making
and struggle, lonely and confused.

So, like children, we begin again
to learn from the things,
because they are in God's heart;
they have never left him.

This is what the things can teach us:
to fall,
patiently to trust our heaviness.
Even a bird has to do that
before he can fly.

~ Rainer Maria Rilke ~

(Rilke's Book of Hours: Love Poems to God,

surrender to the mystery

Lately I have been focusing on the idea of surrender: surrendering to God and to the mystery of the unknown.  Some times I find it easier to surrender than others.  Also, I know there is always room for deeper surrender.

I was working on these ideas with a friend and during a time of contemplation I 'heard' my ego say "Absolutely not, there is no way that I am going to let go and surrender everything to God.  I am not going into the unknown."  As I sat with this awareness I started to feel some pain.  I allowed myself to feel into the pain.  After some time a childhood issue surfaced.  I realized that I had drawn a similar conclusion about being vulnerable in life and to others (i.e., to a certain extent I closed myself off from being vulnerable to others as a result of feeling rejected by my Dad...his moods and his ability to be open and loving toward me varied greatly depending on whether he was drunk or sober...one never knew what they were going to get from him).  Little kids are very open and vulnerable and when the adults in their lives reject them it can feel very painful.  Not letting myself be completely open to love became a way to protect myself.

Although I have worked on these childhood issues before, this time was different.  I saw my Dad as a wounded person, not as someone who was (at least at times) cold-hearted and hurtful.  I saw him as someone who was running away from his own pain...something that we all do in one way or another, and at one time or another.  I felt compassion for him.  Although I do not think that I have been holding onto a lot of resentment towards my Dad for all of these years, I have been holding onto a certain amount of discomfort with getting close and being very vulnerable and exposed to others.  Being willing to open my heart to my own pain (once again) helped me to see my Dad compassionately.  Seeing him as a wounded person enabled me to move into compassion and forgiveness.  

It is interesting to see the parallel between my ability to deeply trust and surrender to God and my ability to do this in relationship with others.

I am not saying that it is necessary to go back and re-live or heal from childhood issues as part of one's spiritual work, however, I do believe that whatever healings are needed will happen as we set the intention to open our hearts and minds to God.
  

      

turning within for truth

My daughter is a musical theater student and she auditioned for a part in Fall play. She was called-back several times for one of the lead roles and was very excited and hopeful that she would get the part.  As it turned out she got a role but not one of the leads.  As I was feeling and letting go of the disappointment that I felt for her, I had a change in perspective.

I thought about Robin Williams.  Although worldly achievements are important for our self-esteem and enjoyment in life in the big scheme of things they actually mean very little. Robin had lots of talent and success and still was very unhappy.  Michael Singer talks about the fact that many women value looking beautiful, such as Marilyn Monroe who achieved this goal and yet she killed herself.

The world of effects can be quite exciting and seductive but these positive feelings are always temporary and illusory.  True joy, love and peace are already ours and can be found right where we are standing if we decide to let go of the roles/identity/ego and allow who we really are to come forth. 

Let go of the world of effects and turn within to find out who you really are.

"How we act and feel depends on how awake we are, and how much we experience that silence, that peace within."(Falling into Grace, p. 95)

(P.S., And as it turns out my daughter loves her new part.  I am happy for her but I strive to  not cling to this happiness.  Michael Singer suggests expressing gratitude for that which opens us but not to cling to the feeling nor the outer cause.)

life is waiting for you to be still

It has been a busy week so I will post something that Adya wrote and I may write more later in the weekend.  Here is what Adya has to say about the role that John the Baptist played in Jesus's awakening.  As you will see in the last sentence, the descent of spirit can come to us when we are open to someone who is awakened or when we are open to spirit through some other avenue of life.

"All that life is waiting for is a moment of being still.  Then the resonant force can be activated in you, opening you so that spirit can come alive in you... You no longer identify yourself with your name, or gender, or occupation, or past history.  You know and experience yourself to be pure spirit, the formless and eternal consciousness of all created things...You don't become divine being: you realize it; you awaken to it.  And you awaken to it when you surrender, when you open yourself deeply to another person who's awake or simply to the mystery of life itself." (Resurrecting Jesus, p.63-64)

Surrender.

Be still and listen.

Allow yourself the gift of finding out who you really are, beyond the drama of the mind.  You are so much more and life is just waiting to show you who you are.

All you have to do is say "Yes!".

"Imagine your human life as what you have come to redeem."

"As I tell people when I teach, 'God so loved the world, that he sent it his only begotten sons and daughters.' That not only applies to Jesus, that's you.  Imagine if you took it on yourself to reorient your life trajectory toward your divinity.  Your divinity: I so loved the world, that I gave it all of myself.  Imagine your birth as an act of pouring yourself forth into life as a loving means of redemption.  Imagine your human life as what you have come to redeem.  And when you've fully awakened to all of it, then you've fully redeemed your human incarnation...

And when you reorient your life toward this realization, then you understand: you so loved the world , you had so much compassion, you had so much love that you poured yourself forth into life and that pouring was your birth. You are here to redeem whatever you encounter in this life, to wake up within everything the deep reality of its divine existence." (Resurrecting Jesus, p. 50)
 
Adya says that we find this human experience of redemption in the silence and the stillness.

This teaching moved me very much.  Instead of resisting or fighting with or trying to change life, what if we knew that we were here to redeem whatever we encounter, to wake up within everything the deep reality of its divine existence?  This is accomplished not through the efforts of the personal will, separate self, or ego but through a deep connection with Spirit.

This gives a whole different perspective to our lives.  Challenges are not something to fix as much as an opportunity to awaken to divinity.  For example, as a parent instead of asking myself "How I can get my teenager to do what I think they need to do?", I ask myself  "What wants to be said or done here?" or "What do I need to say or do to awaken divinity in myself and my kids?"

Connect with Spirit in the silence and the stillness and then pour yourself into your life in order to wake up within everything the deep reality of its divine existence.

moving into the field of light

In my last blog post I quoted Adya as saying “we must pour ourselves forth into life, instead of tying to escape life and avoid its challenges.”  Much of Michael Singer’s book “The Untethered Soul”  is about moving out of our comfort zones by being present with our pain/discomfort/fears (versus building a life around avoiding discomfort) in order to get to a place of freedom and awakening.  I find it interesting that the field of psychology is getting on board with this philosophy by helping people to “be with” their discomfort/anxiety and moving forward in their lives anyway (as opposed to trying to get rid of the anxiety/discomfort…which never works).  I work with these ideas a lot, both personally and with clients. 

One area of discomfort for me is speaking in large groups of people. Although I can and have done this it is something that causes me anxiety.  I have decided to embrace every opportunity to speak in front of groups of people.  I recently attended a weekend workshop where there were lots of opportunities to share.  I noticed that my experiences at the workshop seemed to be different than what most of the other people were sharing.  Most people talked about the positive experiences that they were having while I noticed that I was feeling resistance.  I decided to share my experience anyway which left me feeling a bit vulnerable.

 

I sat with the discomfort of feeling vulnerable.  Do you remember Michael Singer’s analogy about the comfortable house built in the middle of a beautiful field filled with light?  The person inside the house felt so safe and comfortable that they never experienced the beauty of the field and the light that surrounded them.  As I sat with my discomfort I reminded myself that I was letting myself out of that house (which is more like a prison than a place of safety and comfort).

And as the weekend continued (probably at least partially due to the fact that I shared what was authentically happening for me) I had an experience that helped me to break through the resistance. 

Holding onto or avoiding fear, anxiety, pain, judgment, anger blocks us from experiencing ourselves and others as Divine Beings.  To be present with what we are feeling and allowing the feelings to move through us (e.g., by not feeding the feelings with our thoughts...which is a topic for another day) helps us to let go of our small sense of self and move closer to experiencing our True Essence as Beings of Light and Love.

giving yourself to life

Daniel Namod gave a talk about a trip he took to Yellowstone at a service last Sunday (You can hear it on the unitytustin.org website.).  His talk started out to be very entertaining and kind of light.  As I was listening the thought popped into my head that this wasn't as deep as I would like.  For a second I questioned whether I should have come.  I did not attach to these thoughts.  I just noticed them and went back to listening to what Daniel was saying.  He talked about being on a hike and encountering a buffalo who blocked the trail and would not let him proceed.  Daniel had been feeling very much at home, like he belonged in Yellowstone so this experience was very disconcerting.  As it turned out there was a killing about 1/4 of a mile from where Daniel encountered the buffalo...2 bears had killed another buffalo and were in the process of eating it.  If Daniel had gone a little further he would have been killed by the bears.

This story really touched my heart and helped me to heal from the experience with my dog. Perhaps acknowledging and then letting go of the thoughts and feelings about my dog being attacked helped me to open to this healing.  I also recognize the value in not attaching to the chatter of my mind.  My mind is constantly producing some kind of commentary or judgment (e.g., this is not deep enough for me) that can prevent me from being fully present to what I am experiencing in the moment.

Here is a passage from Resurrecting Jesus that relates to what I have been writing about:

"Jesus concludes that passage in the Gospel of Thomas by saying 'If he does not shine, he is darkness.'  That's the challenge...Either we are in light or we are in darkness.  That's a teaching meant to shake us from our slumber.  In order to come into our full potential and to embody truth and radiance of what we are, we must come vitally alive; we must lean once again into presence; we must pour ourselves forth into life, instead of tying to escape life and avoid its challenges.  Then our lives themselves become expressions of love, of overflow, because we have compassionately given ourselves to life, to our incarnation, as a means to redeem it---to bring everything home, back to its source, to the eternal radiance within each and every one of us."  (p. 34-35).

another example of the path of non-resistance

In the last several posts I mentioned some challenges that I have encountered lately.  Some of the challenges have had to do with relationships, mainly looking to relationships to bring me love, joy etc.   When I connected with my deepest and highest Truth I became aware that I am Love and that looking for love (or joy, or peace...) outside of myself is not the way to go.  As Michael Singer describes it, relationships can open us to the love that is already within us, but there is nothing to "get" from another because our source of love is God/Spirit.  As I remember this truth in my daily life my heart opens and my relationships and my life flow much more harmoniously.

Another recent challenge had to do with my dog being attacked by a rottweiler in the park near my home. My dog is fine although it was a traumatic experience for both he and I.  The rottweiler had his mouth around my dog and he wouldn't let go.  I yelled and screamed but I did not kick the rottweiler.  I felt powerless to protect my dog and that is a horrible feeling.  I was at Agape this past Sunday and in that spiritually-charged environment I was able to get in touch with my deepest feelings about the situation.  I felt really bad that I did not do more to help my dog.  I don't know what would have happened if I had kicked the rottweiler.  He might have let my dog go sooner, or he might have bit down harder on my dog (as it was he barely broke the skin), or he might have bit me.  In either case, as I sat there in church I allowed the feelings of remorse, disappointment in myself, and fear arise.  There were no thoughts of self-blame.  I just recognized the feelings.  I let them be.  As uncomfortable as it was to feel those feelings, they needed to be felt so that I can let them go.  Pretending that they are not there just adds additional barriers that keep me from opening to life.  The feelings will pass as I allow them to be present without keeping them locked in place with my thoughts.

(And I now carry pepper spray in case I am ever in a situation like that again.)  

acting from the truth of eternal being

Adya says that as we awaken that trials and tribulations show up in our lives in order to purify us.

"As Jesus moves through his story, from beginning to end, he encounters almost nothing but trials and tribulations.  How does he meet each one of these challenges, from Satan in the desert all the way to the crucifixion?  From what place inside does he act?  You'll see that Jesus is uncompromising:  he always acts from the truth of eternal being.  This is an amazing teaching, and it's message is: If you meet your trials and tribulations from you own deepest realization, they will be released from your system and purified from you, so that eternal being can fully be embodied through your humanity."     (Resurrecting Jesus, p. 43) 


I have done as Adya suggested with a couple of areas of my life that are challenging.  I meditated and prayed in order to connect with my deepest realization.  I then journaled about acting from the truth of my being with regard to the challenges.  It was very powerful and helped me to deal with my life from Truth rather than from ego.  Now to continue to live from that Truth every day!

staying connected

It has been a very busy week so I will just write a short post.  Throughout the past week although I have continued to feel some hurt by God/life (it is as if I have had a lover's quarrel with God) I have continued to show up during meditation and prayer.  I have allowed the hurt to be present but not pulled away from God.

With regard to my daily life it has been a very eventful week and I have watched my psyche swing up and down like a pendulum.  It can be so easy to get swept up in the drama when things really start to heat up.  My goal through it all has been to stay connected with God despite the pull of emotions to get involved in the drama.    

"When you feel threatened, do you respond from you old conditioned sense of self-protection, or do you still maintain a connection with that still point inside-that point of clarity and love inside you where you're not afraid even when you are afraid?  The place where love is greater than the instinct to survive?"  (Resurrecting Jesus, p. 67)

Even though it isn't always possible for me to connect with that still point of love in the midst of a difficult situation, staying present with the feelings and letting go of thoughts, interpretations, and conclusions  eventually brings me back to sense of being connected with God.

an example of being on the path of nonresistance

I have had an unusual experience this week with regard to my spirituality.  Perhaps due to several current situations in my life, I have found that this week I have wanted to turn away from God/Spirit rather than get closer.  There has been some anger, some disappointment, and lots of questioning the meaning of it all.  I have felt very resistant to surrendering to God...and I suspect that surrendering and being vulnerable to God is at the crux of my current struggle.

I have stayed with the process by noticing what I am feeling and allowing the feelings to be present.  I don't know exactly what this is about or where it will lead, but I do know that I need to stay open to my experience and perhaps delve deeper into what I am feeling and perceiving.  I will keep you posted as I move through this experience.

Silence

"The greatest generator of conflict, both internal and external, is our addiction to interpreting and evaluating each and every moment of our experience."  (Falling into Grace, p. 133)

"As we begin to meet life as it is rather than as we think it should be, as we let go our our need to control and continuously interpret our experience, we start to open to life in a completely new way.  We become completely grounded in silence.  The nature of this silence is a lack of conflict with life, and the more we open to this state of nonconflict, to this state of inner stillness, we begin to fall into the grace of a different dimension of being-a dimension rooted in a deep intimacy with our own lives and with existence itself."  (Falling into Grace, p. 134-135)  

A deeper surrender is calling to us.  The Beloved is waiting for us to fall into the vastness of Silence where we will be enfolded in Love.  Be still and wait.    

a fresh and different perspective

Just for today notice how many ways and how often you argue with reality (judging, interpreting, drawing conclusions, rationalizing and justifying, planning and projecting, dwelling, ruminating...).

Most of us have spent most of our lives trying to change reality in order to get our lives to work, and judging by the state of our world, our methods do not seem to be working very well.  Perhaps it is time for a radical shift.  Perhaps it is time to stop struggling with reality, settle in to the stillness of the moment, and allow Spirit to crack us open.

"As we begin to meet life as it is rather than as we think it should be, as we let go of our need to control and continuously interpret our experience, we start to open to life in a completely new way...

As I noted earlier, part of moving into this new dimension of being often involves the appearance of certain cracks within the framework of our habitual way of perceiving life.  We start to become aware of a bright light that is able to shine through these cracks and in to our experience.  Magic and mystery reveal themselves as our old conditioned view of reality breaks apart, and something completely fresh and different comes in.  It is as if this new way of looking at things has always been there but we weren't ever quite able to access it.  This newfound perception is grace, where we receive and experience something that arrives from beyond the way we normally perceive life." (Falling into Grace, p. 134-135)

How paradoxical it is that as we accept things as they are, something new and different reveals itself.  God truly works in mysterious ways!!  


  

coming into alignment with pure, compassionate action and wise action

I hope you are moved by this passage from Adya's book "Falling into Grace."

"What actually happens when we stop judging, when we stop resisting the flow of our lives, is that we come  into an alignment where we are in a natural and clear relationship with whatever presents itself.  

From this place of alignment, the perspective we come upon is not the perspective that we anticipate.  It's not the fearful place of the ego.  The ego thinks we should become indifferent to everything and uncaring in the face of this nonresistance.  But actually something different happens.  Instead of being uncaring, we actually come into a deeper and more intimate relationship with what's happening.  We become very deeply connected. We find ourselves able, in the moment of someone's actual pain or in the middle of our own suffering, to connect very intimately, very purely, without any resistance.  This opens up a door within us for an entirely different response-a response that's not based in opposition.  Instead, this intimacy and stillness guides us into a very precise and effective type of action, a kind of involvement born out of a deep inner connection with life and with others.  This response is not based in conflict, but in wholeness and oneness. When we're not responding out of conflict, division, and resistance, what manifests is pure compassionate action, wise action that comes from intimacy, stillness and true connection." (Falling into Grace, p. 132-133)

All we have to do is let go of our judgments.  Notice what is happening in your life, what you are feeling about what is happening, but do not stand in judgment nor draw conclusions about what should or shouldn't be happening.  Accept the moment as it is showing up and allow pure, compassionate action to manifest from deep within.      

"come into harmony in life"

"The more conscious we become, the more powerful we become.  We don't necessarily become miracle workers, but as we begin to awaken and our state of consciousness opens, different capabilities within us come online and are available to us.  As you come into harmony in life, then mysteriously, almost miraculously, life seems to come into harmony with you.  There is a sense that everything is unfolding just as it need to, that everything is right on time.  As we let go of trying to control life, trying to force it in the direction that the ego wants it to go, life has a way of literally responding to our state of consciousness.  And that's a miracle-that as your state of consciousness transforms, life's relationship with you transforms as well." (Resurrecting Jesus, p. 124)    

Adya goes on to say that we are already one with all of life...all living things breath the same air, rely on water and sun for life to exist...  When we accept the unity of all of life we can relax into life.

Starting today let's accept what is showing up in each moment, knowing that there is a harmony to our lives and a higher purpose waiting to unfold in every instant.

One of the most powerful ways that I come into harmony with life is by being my most authentic self.  When I express myself honestly and with a willingness to be vulnerable I am letting go of egoic control and my life unfolds as it needs to.

When we live life consciously by accepting what is showing up and being authentic in how we respond, our true power and light emerge..just as God intended.

faith

"To have faith is to let go of control; it's to release the ego's instinct to always be in charge.  So faith opens up that aspect of the ego that wants to control everything and think that it has all the answers.  This is what faith is: an opening of the heart, an opening of the mind.  Jesus knew from his own experience that when you open your heart and mind, you literally open yourself to the healing presence.  You open yourself to that which can transform you, physically, spiritually, and psychologically."  ("Resurrecting Jesus," pp. 98-99).

May I rely on faith rather than ego in this moment.

May the world live by faith rather than ego.

"the most powerful healing balm that exists"

To continue with the theme of forgiveness:

"Forgiveness is probably the greatest healer there is.  When we forgive someone, what we've forgiven we're no longer attached to, no longer controlled by...In the story of Jesus, the ultimate act of forgiveness comes near the end, when Jesus says from the cross, 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.' Luke 23:34...And why forgive? Because they know not what they do.  This forgiveness comes from a deep spiritual understanding of the causes of suffering-and also of  those who inflict suffering, for those who inflict suffering have always had suffering inflicted upon them at some prior time. When we start to realize this, our hearts open."  (Ressurecting Jesus, p. 91)    

Notice how often throughout the day you have a need to practice forgiveness.

"It's Jesus' greatest gift, the most powerful healing balm that exists."  (p.91)

forgiveness "I see something in you that's the same as in me."

I was really moved by what Adya wrote about forgiveness in Resurrecting Jesus.

"The open heart is compassionate because it maintains an essential connection. But as soon as we separate ourselves from another-as soon as we say "No there's nothing in you that corresponds with something in me," as soon as we forget that you and I are essentially the same spiritual essence-then we cut ourselves off, and we go into blame.  Forgiveness comes from that deep intuition of our sameness, of our shared humanity. That perception starts to lower the walls of defense, and being judgmental is ultimately a defensive game, a way of saying, "I am not like you."  To forgive is really a way of saying "I see something in you that's the same as in me."  Then, even though you may be upset, even though the other person may have caused you pain or harm, when you connect with your shared humanity, there's forgiveness."  (Resurrecting Jesus, p. 90)

Sometimes it is hard to see the similarity between ourselves and others.  There is a person who appears to be homeless that sits outside of a Starbucks that I pass by most mornings.  I find my mind being a little irritated that he sits there everyday.  Today there was a woman (normally dressed and therefore did not appear to be homeless) sitting on the bench and chatting with the man.  That is what Jesus would have done. He saw the true Essence in everyone.  He did not judge.

Living a life where those types of judgmental thoughts do not set up camp in our awareness would be a beautiful way to live.

When we can accept our own faults, flaws, limitations, dark side etc. then it becomes easier to accept the humanity of others.  Then we can forgive, which means to truly know that we are all One at our Essence, and this allows for the Peace that Passeth All Understanding.  
 
P.S., "Resurrecting Jesus" is the most powerful book that I have ever read.  Reading it is a spiritual experience...the words move me into a connection with Spirit in the same way that mediation helps me to connect with the God within.  

'If he does not shine, he is darkness.'

"Jesus concludes that passage in the Gospel of Thomas by saying 'If he does not shine, he is darkness.'  That's the challenge.  That's the Jesus who tells it to us straight, who doesn't water down the message.  Either we are in light or we are in darkness.  That's a teaching meant to shake us from our slumber.  In order to come into our full potential and to embody truth and radiance of what we are, we must come vitally alive; we must lean once again into presence; we must pour ourselves forth into life, instead of trying to escape life and avoid its challenges.  Then our lives themselves become expressions of love, of overflow, because we have compassionately given ourselves to life, to our incarnation, as a means to redeem it-to bring everything back home, back to its source, to the eternal radiance within each and every one of us."  (Resurrecting Jesus. page 34-35)

If we want to become vitally alive and become  expressions of love then Adyashanti is telling us what to do: "lean once again into presence; we must pour ourselves forth into life, instead of trying to escape life and avoid its challenges."

This statement might require some contemplation.  What does 'leaning into presence' mean?  What does being 'vitally alive' look like?  How might I be escaping life or avoiding challenges?

I ask myself at various points throughout my day:  Am I aware of what is happening in
this moment or am I off thinking about the past or the future?  In other words, am I living in my life or am I living in my head?  Am I aware of presence, right here and right now?  What is happening in my heart space right now?

Whatever is happening in each moment we have an opportunity to experience and express eternal radiance.  We do this by being in our lives in a very real way.  I find that staying very focused on what my heart is experiencing (open versus closed, in pain or in love...) helps me to stay out of my head and grounds me in the reality of the moment.

May we all compassionately give ourselves to life and allow Spirit to awaken us to our eternal radiance.

"Stay with Me"

In "Resurrecting Jesus" Adya talks about Jesus as representing the Christ Self in each of us and the disciples as representing our human self.  I have been listening to a Taize (a French Monastery) chant, Stay with Me, based on the words that Jesus might have spoken to his disciples in the garden of Gethsemane:

Stay here with Me
Remain here with Me
Watch and Pray
Watch and Pray

(You can hear an absolutely beautiful version of this chant at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmAOcHqvS0Q)

Here is my interpretation of the chant:

Stay centered
No matter what, do not get hijacked by the ego
Witness what your egoic self is doing and align yourself with Spirit  (Richard Rohr talks about prayer as "setting out a tuning fork" to align yourself with the Spirit within) (The Naked Now pp. 101-102).

The chant reminds me to go within, take a half a step back from whatever I am dealing with in my life, and pray/align myself with my God Self.

I have had a beautiful week connecting with Spirit by chanting, praying and reading "Resurrecting Jesus."

And it never fails, when I watch or witness from this place of centeredness it is much easier to respond to life with greater wisdom and situations unfold much more harmoniously.  

life lived from the vitality of spirit

According to Adya, letting go of attachment to ego is the first step in awakening.  The second step is letting go of a personal sense of self altogether which he said is much harder than letting go of ego.  From Adya's amazing book "Resurrecting Jesus":

"But Mark tells us over and over again, that true life is not the life of the ego with all of its neurotic fears and desire for control and security.  True life is life lived from the vitality of spirit, and the gospel is good news because, for Mark, Jesus opens the doorway to the Kingdom of Heaven here and now for all who have eyes to see and the courage to repent (to turn around, turn within) and receive the radiance of their true being." (p. 178)

I've spent time this week contemplating what makes letting go of the ego so difficult for me.  Since the intent is present I am not sure why it isn't happening.  I realize that I need to practice more...practice noticing when I have been swept up in the drama of life and then let it go.  I also realize that checking in with my heart to see if it is open or closed is a good way to determine if I have really let go.  If my heart is closed then I have not let go.

Although I cannot make myself wake up, I can take steps towards living a life free of ego by being the awareness and by no longer trying to fix everything with my mind. Here is something that Michael Singer said on one of his CDs:

"I do not expect my mind to fix what is wrong inside of me.
The one inside watching the neurotic mind is quiet.
I relax and release the disturbance.
I am aware that I am aware." 

I surrender my attachment to ego in each moment by being aware of the one inside who notices and checking in with my heart to make sure that it is open.

May all of us experience a life lived from the vitality of spirit!

By your faith you are healed

From Adya's book "Resurrecting Jesus":

"To have faith is to let go of control; it's to release the ego's instinct to always be in charge.  So faith opens up that aspect of ego that wants to control everything and think that it has all the answers.  This is what faith is: an opening of the heart, an opening of the mind. Jesus knew from his own experience that when you open your heart and mind, you literally open yourself to the healing presence.  You open yourself to that which can transform you, physically, spiritually, and psychologically."  (p. 98-99)

Despite our better judgment, how often do we turn to our mind/ego to try to fix our problems or make our life run more smoothly?

Adya and Jesus remind us to surrender all things to God and by our faith we will be healed (i.e., transformed or made whole).

Witnessing, being mindful, meditating, letting go...are all acts of faith (choosing to not attach to the ego and letting Something Else steer the ship).  They are techniques for getting our bloated nothingness out of the way so that our true nature can be experienced and expressed.

Let us open our hearts and minds and allow the healing presence of Spirit to pour forth.  As Richard Rohr says in the Virgin Prayer, there is nothing to change or fix...we just need to let go in faith.

being Part 2

April 25th posting Part 2.

Just had an experience at Starbuck's this AM where I saw myself react from ego instead of presence.  I was trying to "make a presence in the world" instead of just "being presence."  This happens when we become concerned with things like "Am I being noticed?" "Am I being funny enough (or smart enough or attractive enough, or spiritual enough, or kind enough...)?"  The list goes on and on.  It is so easy to get trapped in the desires of egoic mind when we are around other egos.

Be watchful. Be alert to whether you are attaching to ego or just being aware in each moment that life is happening and you are experiencing it.  When we are present, that Presence that unites all of us will show us the way.

being

We have been talking a lot about getting out of the head and becoming aware of the presence within or just 'being'.

Here is an exercise that I heard at a Unity service on Sunday which helps me to get out of my head.  Think of a concept that you are holding onto such as "If I could let go of fear then my life would be harmonious."  Now this is not a bad concept to have, nonetheless, it is limiting. It is dualistic.  It is linear. God (or our God Self) is not limiting, nor dualistic, nor linear.

Can you let go of both aspects of this concept...the part about letting go of fear and the part about having more harmony once there is less fear?

To challenge the above concept ask yourself:  Even though I still have some fear is there not already harmony in my life?  So harmony can exist even if there is fear.

If we hold on to these "if-then" beliefs we are limiting what shows up in our lives. God acts in mysterious and miraculous ways, not according to what our little egoic minds tell us is true.

As we begin to let go of attachment to egoic concepts we begin to awaken to the truth of our being.  In his new book Resurrecting Jesus (Which talks about Jesus's life as a metaphor for awakening): Adya describes awakening as:

"a shift from seeing ourselves as a separated, isolated human being to seeing ourselves as that which we all share.  You can call it consciousness, divine being, spirit, God."  p.41 

We are not who we think we are and it is imperative that we begin to find out who we really are and to live from that place of being.  Why live in illusion and a false and limited identity when our True Nature is so much more?

Easter

Most of us are so attached to the egoic self that it feels real...it feels like home.  The neutral zone that comes from witnessing (i.e., letting go and sitting in the seat of Self) can feel unfamiliar.  It can require effort to get to and stay in this awareness.  However, as we spend more time in meditation, and, more time witnessing and letting go of our attachment to ego the seat of the Self begins to feel more comfortable (more real) than the egoic self.  It is like moving to a new city.  At first everything in the new place feels unfamiliar and strange, but as we spend more time in our new home, neighborhood, and community they begin to feel like home.

The key is to practice sitting in the seat of the Self until it feels like your natural state.

Practice by:
...meditating,
...asking "Who am I?"
...noticing that you are the one who is aware of what is happening.
...choosing the path of unconditional happiness or the path of non-resistance (part III of the Untethered Soul)

Easter is symbolic of Jesus letting go of the human self and resurrecting as the Eternal Self.   During this Holy week resurrect yourself by resting in the Higher Self as often as possible and letting go of attachment to what is happening in your life.  It is only stored energy from the past that is being triggered by current situations.  Let it all die away and allow a newer and Higher Self to emerge.  You will begin to feel at home as your true Self.

Sweet blessings during this time of New Life!

Loving God

Regardless of what is or isn't happening in my life, I can always connect with God.

When this "Divine Union" within is not so easy to access I pray and ask God for help.

I ask God to remove whatever is blocking me.

I wait in hope knowing that God the good is always available to me.

I remind myself that my preferences are not going to bring me lasting joy, and, that honoring and loving God will always bring me joy.

If I want to be happy then I can choose to be happy in this moment no matter what.  I can choose to love God and that always makes me happy.

   

Letting Go Into Freedom and Fulfillment

Michael Singer's latest CD: Letting Go Into Freedom and Fulfillment Part 2: Living in Your Natural State of Being talks about transcending the self by witnessing thoughts and feelings. It is the simplest and clearest explanation of witnessing that I have heard: (Go to tou.org to order the CD).

Here is the general idea:  When our eyes are closed and then we open them we are the witness to what we are seeing.  This is the same process that occurs when we witness what we are thinking and feeling, it is what we do naturally...we notice what it is that we are thinking and feeling.  There is a part of us that is the neutral observer to what our mind is thinking and what our heart is feeling and when we access this neutrality we are witnessing.  

Visual witnessing is easy because we usually feel objective about what we are seeing in the world so we can easily 'just observe.'  The reason that we have difficulty being the witness to our thoughts and feelings is because we have preferences, either positive or negative, and these preferences cause us to lose our perspective as the witness.  We identify with the thought or emotion instead of just noticing it.  Michael says that the way out is to let go of preference as soon as it begins to happen by relaxing and leaning back into the seat of the witness. 

Michael gives a beautiful description of how our consciousness is pulled up towards higher and higher states once we have learned to reside in the witness awareness.  

These ideas remind me of the Virgin Prayer...choose to be a blank slate with no preferences (the neutral witness) and wait for God to name you (let Spirit carry you to higher states of consciousness).


I recommend listening to the CD...Michael goes into greater detail and provides examples to drive the point home.

A side note:  Watch Adyashanti’s interview with Oprah Winfrey on her program "Super Soul Sunday" -- Easter Sunday, April 20, 2014. Adya and Oprah will explore the meaning of grace, and how grace shows up when and where we least expect it.

Watch online:
11am Eastern Time and 11am Pacific Time
http://www.oprah.com/app/super-soul-sunday.html

Find out what cable channel it’s on in your area:
http://www.oprah.com/channel_finder.html

Being conscious or aware

Richard Rohr says that "Being conscious or aware means:
  
*I drop to a level deeper than the passing show.
*I become the calm seer of my dramas from that level
*I watch myself compassionately from a little distance, almost as if the 'myself' is someone else- 'a   corpse,' as St. Francis put it.
*I dis-identify with my own emotional noise, and no longer let it pull me here and there, up and down.
*I stop thinking about this or that and 'collapse into' pure consciousness of nothing in particular.  You don't get  there, you fall there--'objectless consciousness,' as some call it." (The Naked Now, p. 135)

And when this happens:

"Your identity comes from within.  You will want to love and serve others, but you do not use them or need them to define yourself either positively or negatively.  This is surely 'the freedom and glory of the children of God' (Romans 8:21).  Such people know how to love you very well, because they are out of the way."  (The Naked Now, p. 137-8).

When my small self gets in the way, I remind myself to be the Witness or notice who is noticing.  I ask myself "Who am I?"  I let go of self-judgment (either positive or negative) and I wait for God to name me.  I remind myself that the world is not my source for good.  God is my source of abundance, love, peace and joy...

I do not want to cling to this self any longer.  I will let go of my attachment to this self a little bit at a time.  I want to know who I really am.  As I type these words I ask myself "Who am I?"  The answer is a mystery.  I am grateful to have been lead to this point where I desire to know the truth of my being.  Thank you God.

 

Divine Union

As I notice myself being drawn back into "self" I return my awareness to the Witness or Observer Self.  Here is how Richard Rohr describes the Witness:

"Christians would call it the indwelling Holy Spirit, which is 'realized' primarily by surrender to and trust of a divine union that is already given.  You will however, need discipline to keep seeing and trusting this Union, because of all the contrary evidence."  (The Naked Now, page 138).

This divine Union is already and always present.  It is just waiting to be known, to be called upon, to be honored and loved.

The self is also waiting to be honored and loved.  The problem with the self is that it has lots of conditions that need to be met in order for me to feel good about my-self.  The self judges everything and everyone, and, only when it feels that it has done a good job (or feels that it is better than others or feels that it has been recognized for doing a good job...) will it be satisfied.

The divine Union has no requirements or conditions to be fulfilled.  It just is.  God and I are One.  It is already done.  This will never change no matter what I say or do.  God is completely and unconditionally in love with me.  

Each time I bring my awareness back to the Witness or the Holy Place Within I am connecting to the Divine Union.

This seems to be the most important thing for me to do with my life---develop the discipline to keep seeing and trusting this Union...until it is the only thing that I see.

"I am nothing and I am everything"

I wanted to take another stab at trying to put into words the meaning that I got out of Richard Rohr's passage that I posted last week. At first I found the passage to be uncomfortable but when a situation arose in my life that was challenging I applied Richard's idea of accepting the weakness of self and the experience shifted me.

We are all familiar with the idea of the egoic, separate self and the idea of the True, Essential Self.  A person who embodies the True Self might experience themselves as "I am nothing and I am everything." When I read Richard's passage it helped me to get in touch with the "I am nothing" part of the True Self.

This hit me strongly because I am aware of how addicted I can be to myself, and, recognizing that this self is actually 'nothing' provides some balance.  It puts into perspective that my opinions, concerns, desires and life circumstances are not who I am.  This feels very freeing.  When I get pulled back into giving meaning to every little thing that happens in my life, I will remind myself that "I am nothing."

I remain confident that there is more to me than this separate, limited self.  And I will wait for God to reveal to me who I really am.

In your minds you must be the same as Christ Jesus

In The Naked Now, Richard Rohr talks about emptying ourselves of self.  He says that

" 'In your minds you must be the same as Christ Jesus...'

1.Your "state" is also divine. Hold it confidently (the True Self in God).
2. But do not cling to it with any form of self-validation or importance.
3. Instead, "empty yourself" and refuse to self-name----either up or down, positively or negatively.
4. Enter fully into your humble human state of failure and weakness, even to the point of complete detachment, if called to or if possible.
5. Now God can pick you up at the right time, when God is ready.
6.  God can "name" you correctly, secretly, truthfully, and always lovingly, by Him and as His (Experienced True Self).
7. This Self is indestructible, un-offendable, and already in heaven." ( p. 173)   

(This idea is based on a Christian hymn  from Philippians 2:6-11.)

Since none of us human beings are perfect, accepting/witnessing ourselves with human weaknesses seems like something that would be beneficial.  The self is weak.  It does fail.  Although this weakness is not the Truth of Who we are in the absolute sense, it is who we are in the human sense.  If we do not accept this, then we will be trying to achieve the impossible and trying to be something that we are not.

By accepting ourselves as limited and weak, we will be able to accept the same in others.  We will look upon ourselves and others with soft eyes instead of with judgment.

Not labeling ourselves as good or bad while accepting that the human state is limited can help us to let go of identifying with the false self and open us to the Truth that is at the core of our being.

Allow life to take you deeper into Self by accepting and witnessing your humanness, accepting your divine state without using it to build a stronger ego, and then waiting.  Wait for God to name you.  It is then that you will find your Self, that which is a pure expression of God.

The Virgin Prayer

What if we are meant to live as if we were an empty slate...without judgment or expectation or agenda or identity or regrets???

The following prayer is written by Richard Rohr and can be found in his book "The Naked Now" (pp. 174-175).

 The Virgin Prayer

God regarded her in her lowliness.  Luke 1:48

You must seek to be a blank slate.
You must desire to remain unwritten on.
No choosing of this or that.
Not "I am good because."
Nor "I am not good because."
Neither excitement nor boredom.

Remaining Nothing,
An unchosen virgin,
And unchoosing too, just empty.
No story line by which to start the day.
No identity enhancers nor losses
To make yourself valuable or not.

Nothing interesting, nor uninteresting,
Neither against, nor for something.
Nothing to recall from yesterday.
Nothing to look forward to today.

Just me, naked, exposed,
No self to fix, change or find,
Nothing to judge right or wrong,
Important or unimportant,
Worthy or unworthy,
I stand and wait,
neither powerful nor powerless,

For You to name me,
For You to look upon my face,
For You to write my script,
For you to give the kiss,
In your time and your way.

You always do.
And it is always so much better.

"And she gave birth to her firstborn" (Luke2:7), who was the Christ.


We have a choice in each moment to attach to our dualistic thoughts or to become a blank slate upon which God will write something "so much better."

The question is do you want to give birth to something miraculous or do you want to stay stuck in the comfort of your mind?  Choose wisely and be free.

grounding in the body

Some tips for staying in the Now and transcending the egoic self:

"1. Try to stay beneath your thoughts, neither fighting them nor thinking them.
  2.  Hold yourself at a deeper level, perhaps in your chest, solar plexus, or breath, but stay in your body self somehow, and do not rise to the mind.  Everything you know long-term, you know in your body."

These are the first two steps in a Christian tantric "Welling Up" exercise as described by Richard Rohr in his book "The Naked Now: Learning to see as the Mystics see" (pp. 171-172).  Richard talks about grounding oneself in the body as a way to witness (as described by Adya and Michael Singer).

Staying grounded in the body helps me to notice what I am experiencing in the moment and breathing into my body helps me to open my heart, go deeper into the feelings, and release what I am experiencing.

Staying in my body keeps me from attaching to or feeding thoughts.  I have become increasingly aware of how the thoughts trap me.  They trap me into thinking that I am less than or better than.  They convince me that I need to change other people or arrange my life so that I can be happy.  Thoughts such as deciding whether I like or dislike something feed the ego.  Judging what we do and do not like, or, what we think is good or bad is how the ego defines itself.

Richard talks about emptying the self (of such thoughts as well as the related emotions) in order to be the blank slate that God writes Itself on.

Staying grounded in my body is a way to stay focused on what is really happening rather than attending to the ever-changing thoughts of the psyche.  Staying grounded in the body is like the ballast of a ship...it provides balance and stability as I glide through the waters of life.

"See if you can feel what it is to exist only now."

The above quote is from page 175 of Adyashanti's book Falling into Grace.

This is very hard to do.  When I try to stay present in the moment I sometimes feel a great sense of peace. However, I find that unless I really concentrate my efforts on staying with what is happening now my mind easily jumps into thinking about the future or the past.  For example, if we are feeling bad in the moment and we worry that this feeling will continue than we have left the present moment and gone into the future.

Reminding myself that 'I will only find God in this moment not in the future nor in the past' helps motivate me to stay in the now.

Adya says that time is a big block to our awakening.  He also says that letting go of time can free us from suffering.  However, our identity's are linked with our past and future and if we let go of these then we will also be letting go of our identity.

The question is do we want to be free of suffering enough that we are willing to give up our sense of self?
  
Please join me this week in trying to feel what it is to exist only now.  There is nothing to lose because the identity that we will be letting go of is nothing but an illusion (that we and others buy into).  Let's get back to what is Real.  This moment is all that is happening.

Do I dare to exist only in the Now?
 

  

know how to listen

This letter came from Ananda LA:

Dear Donna Mccullough, 

Receptivity is one of the most important qualities to develop on the spiritual path. When someone asked Paramhansa Yogananda how his foremost disciple, Rajarsi Janakananda, reached enlightenment so quickly, his simple response was:"He knows how to listen."

God tries to speak to us in many many ways, each and every day... through our intuition yes, but also, more simply through our daily interactions with others - friends, family, complete strangers. 

The tricky part about intuition is that until we've transcended the ego, it sometimes muddies the crystal clarity of our intuition and gets us into trouble.

If we think of our intuition as a muscle, as Swami Kriyananda has suggested, we need to be honest with ourselves. How often have we worked out our "intuition muscle" and how has it proven beneficial in our daily dealings with the world around us?

Those who lift weights, have a general idea of how much they can carry. They slowly build up to that amount and they know the importance of having a spotter; someone who can lift the weight off if the burden is too great. The spotter encourages the weight lifter to push his boundaries but also can see the reality of the situation and steps in when needed.

In the same way, spiritual community should encourage us to use our intuition and find the answers within, but it also acts as a great mirror for when we might be going astray. If we "know how to listen" as Yoganandaji said, we can be truly blessed by those who are walking the path with us!

Love,
dharmadevi & narayan

As I continue with my spiritual practices of meditation and living mindfully my intuition is developing and I find that I am listening more. Sometimes I notice the intuition after the fact, like when I failed to listen to the inner voice that said "move that vase" about 30 seconds before the cat jumped up onto the table and knocked it over.  There is a harmony and a flow to life and when we are willing to listen we will be guided. 

When the tsunami hit a few years ago there was a tribe of people who knew to get to higher ground before anyone else knew that a tsunami was coming.  These people lived close to nature and they noticed things like the tide flowing in an unusual way, the fish swimming in erratic patterns, the birds and other animals being restless, and the children in the village acting crazy. Because they were watching and listening to what was happening around them and within them they were able to avoid disaster. 

Noticing the still small voice within, listening to others, and noticing what is happening in our lives are all important ways of listening to God.  It has been said before "Stop telling God what to do and start listening to what God has to say to you."